Prisonstuck VIII, continued from LJ

[badpirattitude]

[For someone who claimed he didn't need to rest, the Psiioniic has been sleeping for a long time.]

[Dualscar supposes a manic episode like he had earlier could really take it out of a troll, not to mention the fight in the prison the day before, and being a prisoner, and before that on the run, and before that a slave, and everything else running backwards through the Psiioniic's entire miserable life. Besides all that, living with him, Dualscar, can't be easy, even if it's only been a day, and he half-expects the Psiioniic to ask him to be returned to the prison when he wakes up.]

[Dualscar hasn't slept at all, not really. He can doze in a recuperacoon, but to really sleep, he needs to be underwater. There's nothing physically preventing him from sleeping on land, but for the mental tick that forces his gills open an hour into sleep and leaves him gasping painfully for breath a moment later. He knows well enough why that happens, but he pushes it away every time it creeps into the corners of his mind, nibbling at the edges of his sanity like a longtailed squeakbeast. Either way, he's still curled around the Psiioniic, spooning up behind him while he sleeps, and waiting for him to awake.]

[Waiting, and thinking about all they spoke of the day before.]


polariity

[What, go back to a prison and away from this glorious library? Dualscar, please. You underestimate the Psiioniic's utter nerdery.]

[You also underestimate his affection for you, but that's okay. In all honesty, he isn't quite sure of its depths either. A part of him that still has reservations about this whole thing- which is a rather large part- isn't sure he wants to know.]

[As awakening comes to him, he's aware of the presence still at his back. It's comforting to have that again- someone being there. All this time around other trolls has left him with this need for someone, anyone, to be there.]

[Gently, just to show he's awake, he guides one hand down to lay over Dualscar's.]


badpirattitude

[Either that or he underestimates his own appeal. Dualscar knows he's good at blackrom, but anything even faintly red and he's completely lost. He's spent most of the time while the Psiioniic slept convincing himself that he's irreparably screwed up everything.]

[But then the Psiioniic puts his hand over his, and Dualscar makes a soft, surprised sound. Before he can overthink it, he curls his fingers through the Psiioniic's, joining their hands together.]


polariity

[Funny, sounds like every other moment of his life, too.]

[As the slime warms around their fingers, faintly, he wonders what this makes them. He half knows, half doesn't. They've never said anything to one another about it, just awkward steps with neither of them knowing the way.]

You're alright?

Comments

[polariity]

_{[Sadly, the Psiioniic is nowhere near that kind of food connoisseur. He stays tuned for the first type before he ends up quietly filtering the other out, instead chittering softly to his own drone which follows him about. When Dualscar finally comes back to the table with his spoils, the Psiioniic raises an eyebrow.]}

Why?

[badpirattitude]

[For just a moment, Dualscar's stern expression softens.]

Because fish have wworlds and lives all their own, and if you're going to eat them, you should at least do them the service of knowing wwhich school they came from wwhen they were still in the sea.

[He glances around, looking for an eating utensil, and when he doesn't find one, shrugs and carefully plucks a piece of fish up with his fingers.]

Noww close your eyes and open your mouth.

[And for once, he doesn't mean that in an "I'm going to sexually assault you noww" kind of way.]

[polariity]

<sub>[He certainly did not expect to hear that.]

[For a moment, the Psiioniic only looks at Dualscar, tracing the lines of his face with his eyes. Finally, he reaches over, wrapping his fingers around Dualscar's wrist. He can barely manage it at all.]</sub>

Have you alwayth thought about it that way?

[badpirattitude]

[Dualscar looks away for a moment, not meeting the Psiioniic's eyes, and instead stares at the hand around his wrist.]

If you spend enough time in the ocean... you start to realize things about fish that you wwould never think to associate wwith them.

[Under his shirt, his gills are softly fanning in and out.]

They think, they feel pain, they school together and help each other against predators, some of them even raise their young. So if you're going to eat them... [he looks up at the Psiioniic then] you should knoww them as more than just fish.

[polariity]

You thtay tho dithtant from uth lowbloodth but give tho much thought to the liveth of fith...

_{[Carefully, his hand begins to slip down Dualscar's wrist and down the rest of his arm. After a moment, the Psiioniic pauses and leans in close.]}

You are a peculiar troll, Dualthcar. I don't know what I'm going to do with you.

_{[He takes the fish between his teeth.]}

/keeps using the same icons because she hasn't bought Douchefins a paid yet

[badpirattitude]

[Dualscar watches the Psiioniic's hand as it moves over his arm, and the muscles tighten and contract under his skin, almost as if he is expecting the gentle touch to turn into a blow at any moment.]

[Then the Psiioniic is gently taking the fish from his fingers, and he turns his attention back to that.]

That's wwhite tuna.

/makes a note to change that 8T

[polariity]

_{[No word on that tenseness which never leaves him. Now's not the time. The Psiioniic simply chews and swallows.]}

Alright.

_{[His hands continue to rub against the arm, gentle.]}

oh, I'm just waiting until I app him at EV, then I'll buy him a paid

[badpirattitude]

[Okay, so it appears the Psiioniic is going to grope his arm for awhile. Dualscar can handle that... he guesses.]

Taste howw it's light and smooth? Wwhen it's cooked, it picks up the flavors of wwhatever you cook it wwith.

[He offers him another piece of fish.]

This one is halibut. It's going to taste richer and heavier than the tuna.

oh! Makes sense!

[polariity]

<sub>[It's supposed to be reassuring, Dualscar. Not groping. Why is he even bothering.]

[Looking slightly bemused, the Psiioniic shakes his head.]</sub>

I'll take your word for it then, I thuppothe. We never did anything fanthy with it back then. Jutht cooked it and ate it plain.

_{[Another gulp of fish, tongue and fangs brushing against those fingers, and he feels like some sort of pet.]}

[badpirattitude]

[Dualscar still expects everyone who touches him to have inevitable plans to hurt him, Psiioniic. He's getting a little better, in that he's letting you touch him and not flipping out, but you can't expect miracles.]

If you cooked it wwith oranges, it wwould pick up the flavor.

[He watches as the Psiioniic chews and swallows.]

Taste the difference?

[polariity]

Orangeth thould thtay ath orangeth.

<sub>[And you can quote him on that.]

[At the question, he pauses, mulling over it before he shrugs rather helplessly.]</sub>

A little bit, yeth.

I just realized he's feeding Psii all my favorite sushi fishes

[badpirattitude]

Okay, good.

[He's not expecting miracles; Dualscar knows it takes awhile for trolls to develop a taste for fish and to recognize the different kinds. The next one he chooses is salmon.]

This one has the strongest taste out of wwhat wwe've tried so far.

[And maybe, just maybe, he'll let his hand linger near the Psiioniic's mouth a little longer than is entirely necessary.]

...I can't go get sushi at this hour. ;A; weh

[polariity]

_{[He actually thinks he recognizes that kind, and the Psiioniic perks up a bit at that. It's certainly more familiar than anything else, that much is for certain. There's no hesitation in eating this as well, and he's no fool. Of course he notices that lack of pulling away. His eyelashes flutter as he glances up at Dualscar. Then, carefully, lips still so close to his fingers, he presses a soft kiss to the tips.]}

now I want fish for dinner, dammit

[badpirattitude]

[Dualscar's traitorous heart jogs in his chest, fluttering the same way the Psiioniic's eyelashes do, and he hates the way his breath catches in his throat.]

You... you recognize that one.

[But he doesn't move his hand.]

ha now you suffer with me

[polariity]

I think I do.

_{[And the Psiioniic doesn't move his mouth. He keeps it where it is, lips brushing against those fingers with each word spoken.]}

It theemth familiar to what I uthed to have onthe... Thalmon?

wweh wweh

[badpirattitude]

Yes, that's right... salmon.

[Dualscar doesn't get it; this is not sexy, they are not even close to pailing, all the Psiioniic is doing is brushing his fingertips with his lips! So why is his heart thundering in his chest and the air in the room suddenly feel heavy, difficult to pull into his lungs?]

You... like that one?

[Almost like his body is acting of its own accord, Dualscar is leaning in, his face getting closer to the Psiioniic's, and he moves his hand so that it's lightly cupping the other troll's face.]

[polariity]

_{[In parts of ways, it's like dealing with his skittish lusus all over again. He can't move too fast, or make too sudden a movement, or else he might lose what progress he's made. All he can do is keep up the same reassuring stroking movement along Dualscar's arm and let him come as close as he wants. His heart is skipping in his chest.]</sub< It'sth familiar. Remindth me of home a little bit.}

[badpirattitude]

Yeah?

[The Psiioniic isn't pulling away. He's not pulling away, and that hand on his arm is keeping up the same soft, repetitive motion, and almost unbeknowst to him, Dualscar's muscles are starting to relax a little.]

[Shyly, he moves a little closer.]

Tell me more about your home.

[They're almost touching by now, but Dualscar loses his nerve at the last minute and just hovers, awkward and miserable. He's pailed thousands of trolls... why does this one confuse him and make all these bizarre emotions twine in his stomach at the same time?]

[polariity]

_{[One of these days, he'll get Dualscar to take the next step instead of him. There won't be any pressure. Hopefully, at least. The Psiioniic keeps his shoulders from slumping, because he knows he can't honestly expect much more, and simply nods while his eyes slide shut.]}

Not much to tell. It'sth like any other theathide town. I worked in a factory with otherth from my hive. Communal, we couldn't have much more. Put thingth together a lot with my handth. I told you there were three trollth or tho to a 'coon, didn't I?

[badpirattitude]

You did.

[Dualscar waffles for a moment more, before finally closing the small gap between them and resting his forehead against Psii's. That tension that had slowly bled away? It's back now, every muscle in his body tense and quivering just under the skin, like he might bolt at any moment.]

Wwhy'd you use your hands? Wwhy didn't you use your... you knoww...

[With his free hand, Dualscar gestures vaguely at the Psiioniic's head.]

[polariity]

<sub>[Silence.]

[After a moment, his hand slowly slips from Dualscar's arm and he folds them loosely on his own lap. He finds his words a few seconds after.]</sub>

They uthed to tell thtorieth of what they did to telekineticsth. Older trollth, thometimeth, or otherth our age. Ever thince I wath thmall. Get caught for a highblood, or worth, get 'drafted' into the fleet. Become a Helmthman.

...Thothe were alwayth the wortht taleth. Helmthmen thtorieth. They terrified me. [They still do.]

Tho I'd lie. Fake I wath a weaker telekinetic than I really wath, made mythelf worth a little leth in their eyeth.

The headacheth helped. I'd get them from trying to hold it in- or even if I wathn't. Added to the act. If I thtarted to uthe them ath if I had retherveth to thpare, they would have gotten wary, would have invethtigated more. They would have found out about me.

Tho I lived like that. Thcared and paranoid for motht of my life, trying to keep it a thecret. [His fists clench over one another.] ...I did a lot of thingth back then I'm not proud of.

[badpirattitude]

[It figures. Helmsman stories. No wonder he'd kept his talents hidden, had tried not to stand out, had tried to blend in and be just another slave. Especially considering what waits for him, as soon as the battleship Condescenscion makes its way back to Alternia.]

[Dualscar has never visited a slave labor factory; he got enough of slave ships and what happens in them as a wiggler to satisfy his needs for the rest of his life. But he can understand that fear, that paranoia, probably better than the Psiioniic realizes.]

I'm sorry.

[And this time he doesn't pause when he drops his free hand and folds it around the Psiioniic's.]

[polariity]

_{[His knuckles twitch, but he doesn't jerk his hand away. There's just one long quiet sigh.]}

...And that ith why I will do anything for him.

He took me from that. I would be dead or commissioned by now if not for him.

[badpirattitude]

[And wwhere wwas he wwhen I needed him?]

[Dualscar thinks it, but manages to keep his mouth closed. Instead, he awkwardly runs his thumb over the tops of the Psiioniic's knuckles.]

Speaking of wwhich... wwhat can I do to help the cause?

[polariity]

For now?

Jutht keep them alive. Ruin the thearch effortsth. Thingth like that. That'sth all they need.